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Freakin' Siri!

Posted by Daltons chin dimple on Wednesday, February 6, 2013

The adverts lied. Siri is both educationally sub-normal and a prude. New iPhone = fail.

Col_Matrix
Location:
Posts: 313
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

I find her useful, she sets my alarm and....that's pretty much it but remember when you had to do it yourself?  Stone ages!

"You think we can smell them coming?"
Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 My Siri is a man.  Maybe Siri would be better if I change him into a her.

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
Jakester
Location:
Posts: 5753
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 It's a MAN, BABY!

Richard Gozinya, Harold Snatch and Wilbur Jizz. Together we are the law firm Gozinya, Snatch and Jizz.
The Swollen Goi...
Location:
Posts: 14343
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

I'm a man-baby.

Quasar
Location:
Posts: 7588
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

Dalty was told that Siri would sex-talk to help him masturbate, but the Siri-man is fucking everything all to hell.

Faster and faster, a nightmare we ride. Who'll take the reins when the miracle dies? Faster and faster till everything dies. Killing is our way of keeping alive. - Virgin Steele, Blood and Gasoline
Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 I'm flexible.

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
Drakemd
Location:
Posts: 1905
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 Did you ask Siri if it was raining?  That is all she knows how to answer.

Turn your head and cough!
Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 HE!

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
Quasar
Location:
Posts: 7588
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

I'm pretty sure Samual Jackson had sex with Siri after the commercial ended.

Faster and faster, a nightmare we ride. Who'll take the reins when the miracle dies? Faster and faster till everything dies. Killing is our way of keeping alive. - Virgin Steele, Blood and Gasoline
Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

"English Motherfucker, do you speak it?"

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
The Swollen Goi...
Location:
Posts: 14343
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

Dalty speaks English Motherfucker.

Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 I am English, Motherfucker!

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
Jakester
Location:
Posts: 5753
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 Whenver you write "motherfucker," I hear it with a distinctly American accent, Dalty.

Richard Gozinya, Harold Snatch and Wilbur Jizz. Together we are the law firm Gozinya, Snatch and Jizz.
Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 How very dare you!

Actually, we don't really use that word over here.  We prefer 'Cunt'.

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
The Swollen Goi...
Location:
Posts: 14343
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

Daltons chin dimple wrote:

 I am English, Motherfucker!

I believe you meant to say, "I speak English Motherfucker, Motherfucker!"

Drakemd
Location:
Posts: 1905
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

Daltons chin dimple wrote:

We prefer 'Cunt'.

I think everyone on this board, with the exception of Negs, does too!

Turn your head and cough!
The Swollen Goi...
Location:
Posts: 14343
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

Even KV and Jubbers?

If Jubbers does, it's probably my fault.

Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 Siri doesn't.  He gets all indignant and unhelpful.

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
Jakester
Location:
Posts: 5753
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 Siri's a cunt.

Richard Gozinya, Harold Snatch and Wilbur Jizz. Together we are the law firm Gozinya, Snatch and Jizz.
Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

 An unhelpful one.

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
Drakemd
Location:
Posts: 1905
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

The Swollen Goi... wrote:

Even KV and Jubbers?If Jubbers does, it's probably my fault.

I haven't seen KV on these boards in a while, so I did not include him. Please give my sincere apologies to Jubbers for not including her on the "not preferred" list. More importantly, please let Jubboiter know how sorry I am to have left her off the list and for disrespecting her mom.

Please, PLEASE, ask Jubboiter to spare me.

Turn your head and cough!
The Swollen Goi...
Location:
Posts: 14343
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

I answer your plea with stony silence.

If it is madness to kill a messenger, then Jubboiter is madness.

The Swollen Goi...
Location:
Posts: 14343
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

It's not technically stony silence since I kept talking, but whatever.

The Swollen Goi...
Location:
Posts: 14343
Posted: 8 years 36 weeks ago

It's not technically talking since it was typed on a keyboard, but whatever.

Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 8 years 35 weeks ago

No one will be spared.

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"