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I love it when a plan comes together.

Posted by Daltons chin dimple on Tuesday, February 9, 2010

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z93AADd2Dpo

Going to be good? Going to suck? Too OTT? Will our fondest recollections of the 80's colour our enjoyment? What do you reckon?

Space Tycoon
Location:
Posts: 2464
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

The A-Team does not represent my fondest recollections of the 80's. Hence, I have no preconceptions.

I'm sure it will be....amusing.

Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

C'mon. The A-Team was Saturday teatime staple entertainment for the 11-15 year old!!!

What are your fondest recollections of the 80's ? (....ATTENTION, THREAD VEERING OFF COURSE.....)

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
Jakester
Location:
Posts: 5753
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

Madonna pretending to ride reverse cowgirl in a wedding dress at the MTV awards.

I liked Airwolf a lot. It's on a retro cable channel here in the states, and I've since re-watched it. The first season still isn't bad, but the other two didn't hold up so well. I choose to ignore the 4th season completely (except for the hot Michelle Scarabelli).

Max Headroom.

Richard Gozinya, Harold Snatch and Wilbur Jizz. Together we are the law firm Gozinya, Snatch and Jizz.
Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

Was the 4th season of Airwolf the one with Barry Van Dyke ?

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
Jakester
Location:
Posts: 5753
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

Yes, it was. It was horrible.

Richard Gozinya, Harold Snatch and Wilbur Jizz. Together we are the law firm Gozinya, Snatch and Jizz.
Strider
Location:
Posts: 1430
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

I think The Losers looks like more fun. Plus, it has Zoe Saldana in it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MHvzsFSdxqk

www.gamingoutsiders.com
The Swollen Goi...
Location:
Posts: 14343
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

Losers, Expendables, A-Team, Inglorious Bastards... we're gonna burn out on buddy special ops team movies real quick-like.

Corporal_Hicks
Location:
Posts: 1664
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

In 3D?

Sent from Dalton's IPad.
Corporal_Hicks
Location:
Posts: 1664
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

I trust Stallone with The Expendables more than any of the others.

He is proven in that genre, and Rambo 4 was extremely cathartic, especially in how the bad guys (who were so well set up in that film) got taken down. QT aimed for that and missed with Inglorious. It was really good, and I was rooting for the "heroes" (and there were moments of great measure), but even though there were some really, really nice moments in the 3rd act, the success of the mission wasn't anywhere NEAR as satisfying as it should have been.

I think some have issues with the conservative leanings of Stallone's films (work hard and earn your living, for once in your life for Jesus fucking Christ's sake!), but the man can hit all of the right action beats without going Camereon/Lucas/Bay/Simon West/Stephen Sommers on you.

Sent from Dalton's IPad.
Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

I agree re: Rambo IV. It was like a cinematic antidote to the way action movies had been moving. I thought the opening sequence with the Burmese army and the rice paddy did a good job of leaving you in no doubt as to the sheer bastard-ness of the bad guys without showing them scenery chewing or giving them a white cat to stroke.

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"
Daltons chin dimple
Location:
Posts: 12800
Posted: 10 years 49 weeks ago

And lo, the 80's shall return in cinema form. Expendables review from AICN:
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Caught the Winnetka Pacific Theater advance screening of “The Expendables”. I thoroughly enjoyed the latest Rocky and Rambo movies and grew increasingly excited about this movie as the updates came in regarding who was joining the cast. Stallone had shown with Rambo that he could direct action, wasn’t afraid to throw in some over-the-top violence and this killer line up of names would certainly, in the very least, prove fun and exciting. As the film stands right now, Jean-Claude made a wise decision.

Stallone set out to do a straight-up homage to 80’s macho action hero flicks. The problem is he sticks so close to that formula and makes no concessions for the changes that have taken place in the last 20 years, he actually creates a movie that suffers for its commitment to being a throw back with nothing new brought to the table. We all remember the hero who runs though a hail of hundreds of bullets and never gets hit, right?

Well, even in the late 80’s we were already joking about how silly that was, yet here it is in 2010. Remember when every sexy female character was the victim who needed her man to defend her honor? Well, apparently there has been no evolution there either. The rag tag team of quirky, deadly and constantly bantering Mercs? Check! Now, I loved “Tango and Cash” or “The Last Boy-scout” or whatever Seagal spectacle was playing...back then...but today I want a bit more and I think the average audience member will too. I can always rent “Commando” if I’m feeling nostalgic.

For those of you who like a good vs. bad rundown, here you go:

The Good:

Jason Statham will make it through this movie unscathed, retaining an appealing chemistry with the audience despite a silly subplot about his on-again, off-again girlfriend (Charisma Carpenter, formerly arguably hot in “Angel” and now in desperate need of the gym wins for least appealing or talented actress onscreen in recent memory. Her recent SyFy “House of Bones” is no longer her worst performance).

Jet Li has the best comedic material, playing his size and ongoing money woes for a few chuckles, and he mixes that with some of the better, although too closely shot, fight scenes (totally blowing what coulda/shoulda have been a classic Dolph/Li smack down. Steve Austin was solid as an overly tough right hand to Eric Roberts’ over the top and totally generic bad dude I’ve already forgotten. Mickey Rourke, in the role of a wise, former Expendable with a heart of gold and a tattoo parlor, is as cool as possible with the material given.

The music was mostly classic, known rock tracks and fit very well with the film…except for the ending action scene which was matched up to a horrible ripped-out-of-the-80’s sounding little ditty. Is Survivor still doing soundtracks? I don’t know if this will all make the final cut, but overall the music was just fine.

Two standout action scenes are also worth mentioning: The first was a pier full of baddies getting blown to bits as the result of some creative airplane flying from Stallone and Statham, and the other is the ending siege on the standard issue bad guy fortress…pure cheese, but fun enough with some good arm breaking, stabbing, head dislocating, incinerating, shooting, more shooting, kung-fu, etc. I actually prefer the action scenes in the latest Rambo, but wasn’t bored here.

The last “good” item I’ll mention is the hyped cameos from Bruce Willis and the Governator. It’s a short scene, maybe 5 minutes, with a couple of chuckles, and one solid, but far too expected, laugh regarding a certain character and his political aspirations. Not great, but “good”. Worth mentioning, Bruce looks good, Stallone looks good, Arnold looks like a grandpa…politics must be rough.

The Bad:

The humor was awful. Really, really bad. One of the bad guys in the beginning actually says “I would rather die than hear that joke again” after Dolph tells a nearly unintelligible bit o’ humor during a terrorist hostage pre-credit intro. The terrorist promptly gets shot and by the end of the movie, I wished I had chosen death over hearing the movie’s “humor” as well. He got off easy.

The Expendables is chock full of the worst banter I’ve heard in years and that includes sitting at Denny’s at 2am next to a table of teenage girls. A few, very few, clever lines get out, but the hit-miss ratio will make the creators of “Meet the Spartans” look like geniuses. There was no sense of danger the entire length of the film unless you happen to be evil.

Nobody on the Expendables team ever feels like they are genuinely in danger…Joss Whedon would have decimated this team by the midway point, yet with Stallone at the helm even a traitorous, unrealistically crazy-from-the-get-go team member who gets shot and gives a dying admission lives and is looking fairly chipper by movie end. I don’t think you have to wipe out the team, but the movie is called “The Expendables” so I was expecting a bit of weight to the violence..a sense that there are at least some repercussions when engaging in a war, but nope..nada. Maybe the title is meant to be ironic..ooh..clever Mr. Stallone.

Also, it’s worth mentioning that there is absolutely no attempt to get a female audience. None. Sure, a few scattered females who like brainless, over-the-top action films will see this with arms wide open (especially if no new Twilight is competing against it), but for the remaining 99.9% of women you get female characters who exist purely as victims in a male dominated fantasy world..even the default “heroic” lead female is smacked, slapped, dragged, pulled, tortured and nearly raped only to be saved last second by the strong men of the movie.

A perfect film…for 1985.

....says "Kill Bond, NOW!"